A birthday means celebrating another year of life, and for some people, they are a huge deal. Like, huge.

Maybe it is just me, but lately, it seems that big, elaborate birthday celebrations (and even multiday events) are the norm. Actually, to be honest, I think the way some people celebrate the anniversary of their birth is a little ridiculous, especially if you are an adult.

I mean, it’s ok to celebrate life, but don’t make the rest of us go bankrupt.

Listen, I love my friends and family, but I am not going to spend an entire week, or even a weekend, partying with them to celebrate their very existence. I will happily to go out for dinner, coffee or have a small get-together, but all-day events are just too much, especially for us introverts.

Of course, we don’t want to hurt our friend’s feelings, so how do we still show our love and support for birthdays without losing our needs and beliefs in the process? As always, planning is key when it comes to entering into social situations, so here are a few simple points to keep in mind:

List-Making

Write a list of everything that is needed for the birthday party you are attending. Do you need a gift? Check. Do you need a card? Check. Do you need cash? Check. Do you need an Uber to get home safely? Check. Do you need an excuse to leave early? Just kidding (kind of).

Financial Contribution

Budget accordingly using your list. You need to plan for the cost of a gift, the card, your meal, any food you are bringing, transportation or parking, etc. These things are easy to forget, and they add up!

Cushion Time

Remember to schedule in that bumper of time before and after the event to prepare and decompress.

Schedule in Dates

Compile a list of birthdays in your surrounding group of friends, family and acquaintances so there are no surprises. You can use an app on your phone, write it down in a planner or a use a good ol’ wall calendar to avoid those important days. Showing the people you care for that you value and appreciate them is key to any friendship and relationship, so this is a great way to make someone feel loved. Hint, hint. When you have your calendar going, then it is easier to rearrange events in a way that works for you.

Keep in mind that people who suffer from anxiety and mental illnesses especially need recognition. Being an introvert, maybe your birthday isn’t a big deal to you (not all of us like social events and all), but to someone else, it might mean the world! Don’t underestimate the importance of the impact you have on others.

Also, don’t forget to honor your birthday in a way that makes you happy. If you want a unicorn cake, then have a unicorn cake and enjoy it! After all, nobody is here forever and if you need help eating cake then let me know!

My second podcast, My Crazy Family, is also launching soon. Stay tuned, friends!